Fear

The funding recently came through for me to go back to school.

And I'm really excited.

But, mostly, I'm really scared. And I'm not even sure why. I think I am worried about not being able to do it all. That I wont be able to go to school and still be a good, interactive, attentive mom to Cruz.

I get overwhelmed really, really easily. Really. Easily.

I know that Cruz will always be my number one priority, always. But I dont want to fail at school either. I really want to go to school and get a degree. I want to take be an active part in the financial well being of my son. I have always been, more or less, solely in charge of his physical and emotional well being. And now it feels super important to me to be able to support him financially, all by myself, just incase that ever happens to be the case again; that I'm all by myself...again. I owe that to myself and my son. But, it still scares me.

I've managed to find most of my classes online, so the most I will have to leave him (with my mom) would be 4 hours a week. Thats not the part that worries me. Not at all. Cruz loves to have his Nanny all to himself sometimes. The part that I am afraid of is spreading myself too thin. Can I be a full time student and a full time mom? Is there enough time in the day for both? Is there enough of me to go around?

I guess I'll never know until I try, right? ... Right?

Summertime + Chalk = Perfection

I had forgotten all about how essential sidewalk chalk is to childhood summers. Like peanut butter to jelly. Like Baby to Mama.

Good thing Cruz has an awesome Aunt and Nanny to pick up my slack.

Breast Milk

Have you seen this article in the NY times about breastfeeding in third world countries?

Its heartbreaking and a little frustrating to read. To know that over a million children loose their lives every year because of ill informed mothers. To know that these deaths could be prevented so easily. To know that all that we need to do is provide these women with INFORMATION. Nothing more. Not these huge schemes and million dollar plans to end world hunger and child malnutrition. To just inform women and mothers, to teach them how to care for their babies so that they don't have to bury them.

It hurts to know that we have the very simple resources to help these people (our voices) and still the childhood malnutrition and death goes on.

Disappointed once again in our own inability to help others in need.

Farmers Market

Have I mentioned before that the local farmers market is on the same street as our home? Right outside our door to be exact. And it is one of my very favorite things about living here (though I have so many favorites).

Every wednesday is our little family trip down the road to get our vegetables, fruit and fresh milk for the week.

And the food vendors are always extrordinary. This week Papa has Paella with shrimp and chicken and I had the most amazing corn/mesa/quinoa stuffed bell pepper with spicy corn jambalya. Arent you  salavating just from reading those words?

Hands down the most amazing vendor there. See all this? Handmade baby/kid furniture made from salvaged wood from around this mans property. SWOON.

Tell me this chair was not made for Cruz! At $98 a pop, we had to leave it behind, but it was sorely hard to walk away from. Doesnt Cruz need this entire set of furniture. I think yes.

Thrifty

Cruz and I are frequent visitors to our local second hand stores.
We love nothing more then hoping on our bike and taking a ride down there. Especially now that its hotter in our apartment then it is outside. The slight breeze that a bike ride provides is a much welcomed pleasure for us on these new hottest of days.

Thats right, 50 cents each for these cloth diaper covers! I couldn't have been more thrilled seeing as I had just begrudgingly ordered two new Bum Genius diapers yesterday due to our diminshing stock of diapers that fit. I have an allergy to paying full price for anything. Anything at all. So it made me itch a little to pay the retail price for the two BG's, but I knew my little man needed them badly. And sure enough, the universe paid us back in ten fold with an overflowing basket of hardly used covers at a steal.I've never used these Mama Ease brand before (the cute little safari print) but I am excited to try it. I just made some new organic inserts so we shall see how the hold up.

Funny how such a little success can start the whole day off right. 

A Day for Papa

A day that started out as a trip to the beach ended in a forgotten beach blanket, a baby badly in need of a nap and a very frustrated mama. I find it so aggravating when a well planned out day goes awry and its completely beyond your control.

But after a nice long family nap, we salvaged the end of the day with a trip to 7-11 for slurpees and a visit to the park for our boy.

Breakfast in bed for Papa (which turned it to Breakfast in bed ON Papa. Sticky buns are messy)

Accidentally matching.

On an unrelated note, my photo editing platform has started turning all my photos grainy and blurring. I have been trying to start using GIMP with little luck.  Any suggestions?

That Kind of Day

With all my excitement about summer finally showing its sunny little face in my neck of the woods, I forgot the seemingly minor yet altogether inconvenient side affects of that big, beautiful sun.

Heat.

Babies and heat do not mix well. Nursing mamas and babies and heat really dont mix well. Every nursing encounter ends in a sticky, sweaty mess. And with the heat depleting his liquid stores faster then normal, his nursing has kicked up quite a few notches.

I think we topped out somewhere around 93 degrees today. Big jump from our 65-72 range that has become the norm around these parts lately.

Seeing as we arent huge on diaper wearing on a normal day, the heat has definitely lead to a baby who is stripped of all clothes and diapers by 10am. He enjoys it, but due to the heat making for a sluggish reaction time from Mama (read: lazy mama who wants to lay in front of the fan all day eating dairy free Froyo and drinking peach iced tea) we have had quite a few more accidents then usual. Three to be exact. Once on the couch, once on the bed and once more on the bath mat. Good fun. I wonder if it would be a liberating experience for an adult to just attend to natures calls wherever you happened to be standing. Someone, I'm not sure it would be.

So henceforth are the days of dirty bare feet, naked babies, scraped up knees, wet hair in messy buns and lots of sweaty cuddling/nursing sessions.

Forgive  the grainy photos or weird formatting, I'm borrowing my brothers PC while he has my Mac. Did I mention that I think PC's are the hardest electronic in the world to use. I'm PC illiterate for sure.

Summer

It has finally arrived in this little town of mine. Its taken an exceptionally long time to arrive this year, especially considering that California is known for its weather. Up until this last week, it has been sweater and pants weather. Thankfully we run right into dresses/skirts/tank tops weather.


My little eyes have been swimming in these images, day dreaming of warm beaches, cool water and reminiscing on the long gone days of wearing a bikini.

All photos via
Top photo via my instagram: Cruz's new (and first) sandals

New Love

Yes, I have a new love in my life.

Big.

Black.

Shiny.

BIKE.

I have been swooning over pictures of bikes for months and months now. Don't these make you want to dress up in your sunday best and ride around town for no reason at all?

top four via
bottom three via

I dont look quite as whimsical on my new bike, but it was surely love at first sight. Though I didnt love the cost of repairing it and eqiupting it for Cruz, finding the bike iteself on CL for $40 took the sting out of forking over the money to repair it.

Diaper Swap

Despite my best efforts to cling to his babyhood, Cruz continues to grow, grow, grow.

So much so that he is quickly outgrowing his current cloth diapers.

Leaving me with lots and lots of size small and medium covers and inserts.

Anyone interested in doing a cloth diaper swap? Email me.

We need larges for my big (to me) guy.

Home Inspiration

Decorating this new space has been tons of fun and as soon as everything is in order I promise a little home tour. But for now, here are a few of my favorite inspiration pieces, some which I will be using to inspire my own projects and some which I will be trying to duplicate spot on (read: chevron stripes!!)

Loving you picture

Sunshine picture

Drawers

Chest

Picture frame

Do you have any projects in the making? Inspirations? Share with me. 

 HELLO OUT THERE!!

Not quite sure why I can't seem to get back on the ball with blogging.
Settling into this new life and making this cold, open, blank house into a home has taken a lot more of me then I realized.

But, I'm loving it and couldnt be happier.

While I have been slacking on the blog end of my life, I have not been lagging in my thrift store scouring. Almost EVERY day Cruz and I go to the second hand stores. We are lucky enough to have two without a 3 minute walking distance. And they both have great kids/toy sections so often times we just go to play and dont buy anything at all.

Today, Cruz, Papa and I did a little meandering down there and found a few little treasures. See that oh-so-cute cup up there? $.50!

 

Some super cute fabrics $.50 each. The top one is soon to be some kitchen stool pad covers!

Yarn for the seemingly never ending crochet afghan.

A Crate and Barrel popcorn bowl ($3.00) which will really be a mixing bowl (b/c mixing bowls are hard to find and get snatched up quickly at thrift stores...and b/c I break bowls on the reg. The floor here is finished cement and the counters are granite=recipe for a lot of broken glass)

A book for Mama and a book for baby. 

(Actually the book for mama "The Days of Ofelia" will soon be finding its new permanent home with my little cousin Ophelia. Spelled differently, but still fun to have a book with your name on it).